First, come up with an idea. The juicier and surprising the better! Adjective lists are key. Let your mom know about your idea. Moms never tell you something is ridiculous until after you do it!
Next, set up a schedule to write your book. Everyone feels accomplished when they get things done before noon! Ignore the haters. They will be first in line when you are the next E.L. James. E-Books are totally in. Maybe yours will be so successful it becomes a movie starring a hottie who plays a serial killer on a BBC series.
Finally, get that thing published. Make sure to read aloud to all of your friends so they can see just how hard you worked! Coffee shops are good for this too. No one goes to a coffee shop to drink coffee anymore. All the other budding writers on their Max Book Pros will want to hear your excellent prose. Next stop $.99 Kindle offer!
Tina Belcher’s (my) advice is so good it should be showcased at the Iowa Writers’ Workshop. It is not though so take all with a grain of salt, or a hand of sand. Good luck and happy novelling!
#TBT The Snark Notes Edition: August 6, 2008. This is a repost from a previous site I used to ramble about television.
Ever since the creation of being funny on television or referencing obscure stuff to make either viewers seem smarter or more stupid than their friends, screenwriters for some reason believe that references to Samuel Beckett’s absurdist play Waiting for Godot are necessary to make fun of why someone is late or missing. Everything from Dawson’s Creek, to House, to Buffy the Vampire Slayer have made references to the play. It seems as if any time a TV show wants to remark on why a character is remotely late, Beckett’s fateful play is used to make fun of the situation.
Waiting for Godot is arguably one of the best plays of the mid 20th Century regarding people’s obsessions with existential, Jungian/ Freudian, other philosophical and political thoughts of the time. The play is about two guys who sit around waiting for this other guy Godot, who inevitably, never arrives. There have been many interpretations on who Godot represents, and who Vladimir and Estragon (the guys sitting around) are supposed to represent. They have ranged from Godot representing a divine power who never comes to rescue Vlad and his bud, to waiting for things we can never have, to mindless waiting for anything. The main point is, television seems to ignore the entire interpretation of the play and have reduced it to waiting for a friend, husband, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc, who all incidentally eventually show up, unlike Godot.
To breakdown the misuse and obsession with referencing Godot, here are some examples:
Dawson’s Creek:
In the season premiere of the sixth season, Joey, Pacey, Jen, Jack, and Audrey are sitting around a bar hanging out when Joey asks where Dawson is. Audrey then responds:
“You mean “Godot” Leary?”
No Audrey, we do not mean Dawson ‘Godot” Leary, because Dawson shows up at the end of the show. He actually shows up well before the end of the show, which is something Godot never does. Dawson arrives after Joey, who I guess in this situation is the Vladimir, or maybe Estragon, waits around in the bar for him. He shows up, they go back to her dorm room, and history of the Joey/ Dawson relationship continues. I guess it wouldn’t be Dawson’s Creek without obscure literary references. Some even claim that Waiting for Godot was the inspiration for the entire series of Dawson’s Creek. God help us.
House:
House has made several references to Waiting for Godot. The first reference was the typical “where are they” reference. Wilson comments in Season 1, episode “The Poison” on the delayed reaction by the CDC by remarking that:
“Godot would be faster”
The CDC does show up. They always show up. Haven’t you seen Outbreak? [However the current ebola situation in West Africa is making me reevaluate this previous statement]
Waiting for Godot is referenced two seasons later during season 3 in “Finding Judas”, when Chase is frustrated because House won’t listen to him, which causes Wilson (what is with Wilson and Samuel Beckett) to reference Godot once again:
“Beckett would have called his play ‘Waiting for House’s approval’, but thought it would be too grim”
Gilmore Girls:
Keeping it in the WB family, Gilmore Girls followed in Dawson’s footsteps and their incessant references with their own Godot blurb. While sitting around Richard and Emily’s dining room table during Friday night dinner, Lorelai, in her insesent need to say things that no one else understands, remarks on how they have been waiting forever for Richard to come to the dinner table. Emily in her usual manner responds that it has not been forever. When Lorelai responds:
“Forever. Godot was just here. He said ‘I ain’t waiting for Richard,’ grabbed a roll and left. It’s been forever!”
This one is actually amusing. Godot is not Richard, which makes this reference funny because they have been sitting at the dinner table so long that Godot actually showed up, but Richard still hasn’t.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
Joss Whedon is known for his obscure references and witty humor. This is no different in carrying on the television legacy of referencing Godot. During season 3, we are introduced to a new slayer, Faith. She is known for being a badass and not for her punctuality. In one particular scene, the scooby gang: Buffy, Willow, Xander, Cordelia, Oz, Giles, and even Wesley are sitting around the library, figuring out how to save the world. Wesley tells Buffy she wait for Faith to go hunt down the demon. Buffy responds with:
“That could be hours. The girl makes Godot look punctual. I’ll just go myself. “
Yes, Faith shows up eventually and actually turns out to be evil, which is a weirder take on the play. But again, Joss uses Waiting for Godot to poke fun at a characters tardiness.
Joss makes another Waiting for Godot reference earlier in the series during season 1. This time it is a quote from the play and not just making fun of the fact that some is late. Written on the blackboard in the back of a classroom:
“To every man his little cross. ‘Til he dies. And is forgotten.”
This is both in reference to the play, but also the storyline which is about a girl who becomes invisible because nobody noticed her.
There have been numerous other references from names of episodes, like Home Improvement’s “Go, Go, Godot” to plays on the name of the play like Red Dwarf’s “Waiting for God” and the Riches’ “Waiting for Dogot”. Even television shows are analyzed as philosophical interpretations of the play, like South Park, yes I said South Park. They all might be a stretch, but the references and interpretations of Waiting for Godot will be forever infused into our society and the television we watch. Whether our society understands the references or not, that is something that will just need to wait for another day. My guess is no, but really who’s to say. All we can do is wait until another television show decides to reference Godot because one of their characters lacks punctuality. Until then, I think I might just go hang out with Pozzo.
The Snark Notes 